Forever Beloved

Faith, Love & Truth

the hardest lesson i’ve learned

i am a people pleaser by nature.  i just want everyone to be happy with me and like me.  but, as i’ve recently learned, that is not possible.  you just can’t please everyone all of the time.
many of you know, i am a photographer.  as a photographer i naturally want to please all of my clients.  i want them to walk away from our session not only blown away by their pictures but i also want to gain them as a friend.  sadly, i’ve had to realize not everyone will absolutely love their pictures.  there are a few different reasons this can happen…either they weren’t familiar with my style before-hand, they hate how they look or (for weddings) a guest ruined their shots.  regardless of the reason, the rejection is still ouchie.  
i really feel God has called me to be a photographer and blessed me with a gift.  i can honestly say though, the rejection crushes a part of my spirit.  and in my weaker moments, i find myself giving in to satan’s lies about my work and about me as a person.  satan takes every opportunity he can to swoop in, knock me down and leave me feeling vulnerable.  
the Bible never tells us to please other people.  you can search through the Bible verse by verse, front to back, and you’ll never find those words in it.  but what you will find is instruction to please God.  He IS the most important element in our lives.  and when we live to please God, when we run a business to please Him, we may not be pleasing everyone around us.  God is reminding me that He didn’t call me to live a happy life, but a life that honors Him. and while I’m going to fail over and over again, my desire is to live the life He has called me to live.
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
Galatians 1:10

out for now
~kisses
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a proverbs 31 woman

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; 
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 
Proverbs 31:30
of all the weeks we’ve been doing this study, this one has spoken the loudest to my heart. i will absolutely admit, i’ve struggled with a poor self-image most of my life. i’ve never thought i was thin enough, pretty enough or worthy enough. i would be ashamed if ya’all could heart the ugly self-talk that goes on inside my head. it’s not pretty. not at all. it’s something that God has revealed in my heart that i need to tend to.

fast forward to this weeks bible study.

this girl is a slow learner but i’m fairly sure this week God got His point across to me, loud and clear. how many of you just said a little silent hallelujah? i know, me too!

the kind of beauty i’ve stressed and worried about my entire life is external beauty. the one all of us women think about, whether we admit it or not. the kind the media throws in our face daily. the kind we all wish we had more of.

then there is inner beauty. the one no one can see. the one that is there if people would give us time to show it. the one that God see’s and appreciates. inward beauty holds much more value than outward beauty. and the beauty of our heart is so much more important.

so how can we balance outer and inner beauty?

i think modesty is really important.  you can convey beauty and femininity with conveying your sexuality. allow your appearance to reflect your pure and virtuous heart. know your worth and reflect it on the outside. your body is a gift from God, honor it as such.     

be beautiful with your attitude and speech.  your words are a mirror to your heart.  i’m sure you’ve been around an attractive person that instantly became unattractive by the ugly that came out of their mouth.  

still tend to your appearance.  i’m not suggesting that it become necessary to throw away my makeup forever and go through life looking less than presentable. ya’all, that is not going to happen! we do need to take care of our appearance and not let our self go. we need to still celebrate our womanhood and remind our husband what he has.  i’m sure the lovely Proverbs 31 lady certainly doesn’t wear sweats everyday with her hair in a bun.  she took pride in her body, heart and mind!  she truly was Gods kind of beautiful.

but most of all, this woman fears the Lord. a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. i think that fearing the Lord means i live my life for Him, with respect for Him, honoring Him and i want to please Him. it means living every day knowing He is there with you.

  

we are beautiful on the inside and outside when we acknowledge Christ’s deep and abiding love for us. love that doesn’t change with our accomplishments or appearance.  i keep reminding myself, He was the first one to call me beautiful.  not because of my appearance, but because of my heart.  for who i am.  for my soul.   He loves me in spite of my scars, booty, nose, bags under my eyes, discolored skin and droopy eyelids. His love is always, always, forever there…accepting us exactly for who we are.

let Him love on you, you’re the love of His heart!  you are His precious daughter, His lovely princess. His joy. the apple of His eye. He loves you to the moon and back. and He calls you beautiful!

out for now

~kisses
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a special poem for mama’s

lately, as my babies turned 14 and 16, i’ve been struck with the reality that soon my littles will be leaving the house. the hardest thing i’m ever going to have to do is allow them to spread their wings and fly. but i keep reminding myself, they are children of God and were only loaned to me for a while.

during one of my sad mama days, i came across this poem. and of course, shed more tears. even though it’s a smidgen sad, it perfectly puts into words the heart of a mama. and now i’m going to quit typing, before i work myself into a big bawling fit again.

Let Me Hold You Longer
a poem by Karen Kingsbury
Long ago you came to me, a miracle of firsts;
First smiles and teeth and baby steps, a sunbeam on the burst.
But one day you will move away and leave to me your past
And I will be left thinking of a lifetime of your lasts.
The last time that I held a bottle to your baby lips
The last time that I lifted you and held you on my hip,
The last night when you woke up crying,
Needing to be walked,
When last you crawled up with your blanket
Wanting to be rocked.
The last time when you ran to me still small enough to hold
The last time when you said you’d marry me when you grew old.
Precious simple moments and bright flashes from your past
Would I have held on longer if I’d known they were your last?
Our last adventure to the park, your final midday nap
The last time when you wore your favorite faded baseball cap.
Your last few hours of kindergarten, last days of first grade,
Your last at bat in Little League, last colored picture made.
I never said goodbye to all your yesterdays long past
So what about tomorrow? Will I recognize your lasts?
The last time that you catch a frog in that old backyard pond
The last that you ran barefoot across our fresh-cut lawn
Silly, scattered moments and bright flashes from your past
I keep on taking pictures, never quite sure of your last.
The last time that I comb your hair or stop a pillow fight,
The last time that I tuck you in and pray with you at night.
The last time when we cuddled with a book just me and you,
The last time you jump in our bed and sleep between us two.
The last piano lesson, the last vacation to the lake
Your last few weeks of middle school, last soccer goal you make.
I look ahead and dream of days that haven’t come to pass
But as I do I sometimes miss today’s sweet precious lasts.
The last time that I help you with a math or spelling test
The last time when I shout that “Yes! Your room is still a mess!”
The last time that you need me for a ride from here to there
The last time that you spend the night with your old tattered bear.
My life keeps moving faster, stealing precious days that pass
I want to hold on longer, want to recognize your lasts.
The last thing that you need my help with, details of a dance,
And the last time that you asked me for advice about romance.
The last time that you talked to me about your hopes and dreams
The last time that you wear a jersey for your high school team.
I’ve watched you grow and barely noticed seasons as they pass
If I could freeze the hands of time, I’d hold onto your lasts.
For come some bright fall morning, you’ll be going far away
College life will beckon in a brilliant sort of way
One last hug, one last goodbye, one quick and hurried kiss,
One last time to understand just how much you’ll be missed.
I’ll watch you leave and think how fast our time together passed
So let me hold on longer, God, to every precious last.
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