Before I begin, you need to know something about me.

I’m a Type-A, listing making, notebook keeping, people pleasing kind of girl.  I have a huge desire to make a good impression, be liked and be accepted.  I want the parties I throw, the relationships and friendships I have and my business to all run perfectly perfect.

And the thought of rejection makes my heart race.

The thought of not being liked, wanted or welcome makes it hard to breathe.

Those are the times when I have to force myself to step back and gain perspective.  Not because I want to.  But because I need to.

Rejection is hard.  Babies even cry when they’re rejected.  I can tell you first hand, being an adult doesn’t make that rejection any easier.  We are created with the desire to be loved and accepted just as we are.  But we will all experience rejection at some point in our lives.  People hurl flaming arrows of rejection at their family members, co-workers, and peers without a second thought not realizing the depths of their damage.  Damage that can reach throughout generations.

People didn’t like Jesus either.

I know, it sounds like a Sunday School lesson on the flannelgraph right?  But it’s actually not only encouraging but comforting to read the countless stories of Jesus being rejected too.  He gets it y’all.  He understands what it feels like to be rejected.  The sting and the hurt.  Not only that, but He dealt with it perfectly.  1 Peter 2:21 says For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps.

There are things about you that are unlikeable.

Whew, that’s a hard one y’all especially for this girl.  It takes a good bit of humilty to realize I’m not perfect.  I have to be honest and realize there are things about me that are pretty unlikeable.  My loudness, my stubbornness and my quick temper sure aren’t my strong points.  When we feel rejected, it give us an opportunity to ask God to make those areas visible to us, to help us work on them and to trust His promise that He will completely restore every single ugly and broken area of my life, in His timing.

Let it lead you to Jesus.

We have to choices when we feel rejected, feel sorry for ourselves and get angry or go to the cross.  We can choose to move away from Him or towards Him.  And I remind myself that God will never reject me.  God is not rejecting me just because someone else has.  One of Satan’s favorite lies is that because someone is rejecting me, so is God.  The truth is God loves me no matter how people treat me.

Don’t respond out of anger.

When I am rejected, and hurting, I can assure you my first response isn’t godly.  I’m the first to admit I have a hot head and a fat mouth.  This, my friends, has taken a lot of prayer on my end.

And with gentle prompts from Him, I’ve heard be silent and keep your eyes on Me.  My first response was the opposite.  My goal was to hurt them just as they hurt me.  God is showing me how to let mercy and grace lead the way.

Forgive.

I’m going to be honest, I’m not a good forgiver.  If there is one thing I’m good at, it’s holding a grudge.  Actually, I might even be considered a professional grudge holder.  Forgiveness, no matter who it is directed to, is something that just doesn’t come easily to me.  Add in someone rejecting, and hurting, and it’s doubly as hard.

How do you forgive the one who caused such pain and created those deep, searing wounds.

What does Jesus say about holding a grudge?  He commands us to overlook sins and forgive those who hurt us.  He doesn’t ask us to do that, the Lord commands us to do that.

Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
Ephesians 4:31-32

But somewhere buried in our subconscious, we think the rules don’t apply to us.  The pain we know doesn’t fit the requirements of forgiveness.  We {read this as me} rationalize and justify our pain over and over again, talking ourselves out of forgiving.

And then we become resentful, angry, unforgiving and cold.

I am beginning with one simple statement…this is my opportunity to show them Jesus through me.  To be kind and tenderhearted, expecting nothing in return.

Healing is possible.

When we find ourselves in the midst of ripped pages and the reflection of a broken heart, it’s comforting to know He is already there.  In all my broken places, God has turned a my mess into a holy offering by pouring Himself right in.  He has never left me down.  And now those cracks allow Him to pour right out.

I know in the middle of my messy mascara days, He’s busy writing an amazing story.

Beth Moore, in Praying God’s Word, said:

The rejected person who turns entirely to God and His Word can find glorious restoration and acceptance in Christ no matter what happens.

The Bible never tells us to please other people.  You can search through the Bible verse by verse, front to back, and you’ll never find those words in it.  But what you will find is instruction to please God.  He is the most important element in our lives.  And when we live to please God that may mean not pleasing everyone around us.  God is reminding me that He didn’t call me to live a happy life, but a life that honors Him.  And while I’m going to fail over and over again, my desire is to live the life He has called me to live.

In this world we will no doubt experience the rejection of someone not liking us again and again.  But if we keep our eyes on Him, He will restore our broken hearts and turn our troubles into triumph.

Today I’m celebrating God’s faithfulness in bringing me through every rejection in my life and keeping me vitally connected to Him.  Oh how He loves me – and you.

Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.
Galatians 1:10

He turns 44 today!!!  So I’m going to continue the tradition and list 44 reasons (in no particular order) WHY I am totally, utterly and completely head over heels in love with him.

1.  Watching you grow in your walk with the Lord, I love that so very, very much.  It makes this tenderhearted wife teary.  I adore your willingness and heart to help walk alongside other Christian men.  I can’t even put into words how proud I was to watch you get baptized alongside our sweet babies.

2.  You amazingly lead this household.  You’ve encouraged Christ entering our marriage, you’ve lead our home and gently guided me. You’ve shown me such grace, which I am so thankful for.

3.  You are an amazing father.  Watching you love our babies has been a complete joy.

4.  You are always, always 100% devoted to your family.

5.  You will let a little girl do your hair, makeup and paint your nails…just to make her smile.

6.  It doesn’t matter what size I am, you always tell me how beautiful I am.  Not only do I totally believe you see me like that, you make me see myself like that too.  You have no idea how much that means to me and how much I appreciate it.

7.  That big plow truck you drive.

8.  How you get totally excited about the same simple country pleasures I do. Whether it’s a hot loaf of homemade bread, a new recipe to can or a late night 4 wheeler ride.

9.  I love that you hold my hand while you drive.

10. When I see someone broken down along the road, I automatically know you’re going to stop.  I love that you’re so willing to help a stranger.

11. I love your spontaneity and that I can ask you to go anywhere on a complete whim, and you will!  And that you’re willing to drive every single time.

12. You always know the absolute perfect time to give me a hug accompanied by “It will all work out babe”.  P.S. you give the best hugs ever!

13. Your voice still melts my heart after all these years.  It instantly takes me back to that day 21 years ago…when you sing that song, I get tears in my eyes still.

14. Long summer 4-wheeler rides on those warm days.  Which also means me sneaking in some snuggle time.

15. Your willingness to send me to a women’s faith retreat just because you know how much I want to go and how much I need it.  And you staying home all weekend with the kids.  That meant so much to me.

16. I’m fairly sure you’re just as chicken obsessed as I am!

17. Your passion for all types of music and how you’ve made it such a big part of our lives (and now our children’s lives).

18. Your selfless heart.

19. The silly, crazy songs you can make up on a moment’s notice.  Even though they are about me sometimes (it’s ok…I act mad but secretly laugh inside).

20. Your love for Big Brother.

21. Those shoulders, yeah, I still love them super huge amounts.

22. I’m thankful for how good you are at geography.  You know if it was up to me, we wouldn’t make it too far out of town.

23. You willingness to humor me and let me take pics of you even though you hate having your picture taken.  Although I don’t think you hate it quite as much as you say.

24. You explain football calls to me {and basically every other aspect of the game}. Even though you know perfectly well that I will interrupt the next game asking the same annoying questions.

25. Your constant, never-ending support of me.

26. Still having a smokin’ hot marriage after nearly 21 years.

27. You’re always so quick to apologize to me even though you know I’m not so quick (or good) at it.

28. Your love of trucks equals mine.

29. Your obsession with the news, politics and gun rights. You always know what is going on, which is good because I never do.

30. How easy it is for you to make me or others around us laugh.

31. You love self expression just as much as I do.  I kinda love our long conversations about tattoo ideas.

32. You thinks it’s hilarious to chase me around the house or up the stairs, with me screaming, after we watch a scary movie.  You laugh every single time.  And, without fail, I will scream even though I know it’s you.  And if I pee my pants you laugh even harder.

33. Even when your skin is melting off you still let me cuddle all night long.  I don’t know what I would do without my “furnace”.

34. How you always know the right words to make me feel better instantly.

35. Our weekends away together.  I sure do love reconnecting with you.

36. All the little funny memories we’ve made together.

37. Peaking around the corner and seeing you doing a crazy dance with the kids. Yeah, I saw it, many times.  And every time it makes me smile.

38. After I had Jade, you told me “Thank you for giving me a perfect little girl” and kissed me on the forehead.  I will never forget that moment.

39. You’re a little bit rock-n-roll to my little bit country.

40. Your daily “uniform”…T shirt, jeans and work boots.

41. I love that if I say “Let’s pay for their dinner”, even though they’re a stranger you will pay for it without even questioning me.

42. With all my sicknesses, operations and hospital stays over the last few years you’ve never once hesitated to jump in and take over everything yourself.  Never once complaining of the extra workload on you, on top of your full-time job.  You were such an amazing blessing!

43. Your love and compassion for animals.  And the fact that you don’t get mad when I tell you I may be hatching us out a few more chicks.

44. Simply because you are just you.  The man I feel in love with 21 years ago.  The man I still love madly, more and more everyday.