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Forever Beloved

Faith, Love & Truth

September 14, 2020

Marriage Restoration | The Beauty of Inviting God In

Our marriage was dying.

It was like a slow, silent kind of death.  One we were both uncomfortably aware of but unwilling to speak about.

Hopelessness consumed our days.  We wore hurt and brokenness daily like winter jackets.

Our marriage seemed comprised of arguments, an unwillingness to understand or listen to each other and selfish hearts.

We were living in the same house and unsure of what the future looked like.

On a warm summer day the silence was broken and we found ourselves at a crossroads between divorce and reconciliation.

We spent days in silence that seemed so loud.  We spent days being swallowed up by anger.  We spent days having tear soaked faces.  We spent days having hopelessness walk beside us.

But, then GOD.

There was a night when I was at my breaking point.  In a panic I grabbed my keys, got in my car and started driving with no destination in mind.  I ended up on a hill in the middle of the woods.  It was a clear, warm summer night.  The sky was covered with stars and I could see for miles around.  I listened to hymns and sang along.  With a tear-soaked face I talked to God for hours on end.  In the moment I was seeking Him and God was seeking my heart.  When I left the hill that night I had something new, hope!

I could feel excitement stirring in my heart as I drove off that hill.  I couldn’t wait to get home and tell my husband what the conversation between God and I held.

In that moment we were catapulted into trusting Him more than we ever had to in the past.

We prayerfully handed our marriage to God, knowing we couldn’t revive it ourselves.  We trusted the God of Restoration to work miracles and bring our dead marriage back to life.

[ctt template=”8″ link=”eNiAF” via=”no” ]We did something we had never done in the past, we invited God into our marriage.[/ctt]

And with that, God breathed new life into our dying marriage.

We stepped boldly into reconciliation.  He showed us both forgiveness in a way we had never known and restored our marriage, making it better than it ever had been in the past.  Our marriage was now filled with compromise, hope, selflessness and love.

We quickly realized that prayer is a necessary piece of restoration.  We needed to seek the Lord’s wisdom daily and continually invite Him in.

Against all odds, against all friendly advice, against the worlds opinion we continually stood for our marriage.

Sixteen years later, our marriage is strong and solid, securely set now on a firm foundation. Perfect?  No, is any marriage truly perfect?  Better than my twenty-year-old, naive self dreamed? Without a doubt!

I want to speak to those of you who find yourselves where we were, in the midst of a dying marriage.  Your heart dreams of the day your marriage can be restored.  A time when the days aren’t so long and the nights aren’t as lonely.  Sweet friend, I was you not so long ago.

The first bit of advice I would give you is to make your stance on your marriage known.  Make it loudly known and do not budge on your decision.  Well-meaning people may try to sway your decision.  Kindly, lovingly but firmly let them know you are standing for your marriage, period.

Next, this isn’t a quick process.  There is no quick fix. It’s a long process with a series of steps.  It’s a marathon girl, but hang in there, even marathons have a finish line!  Surround yourself with godly, encouraging people who will cheer your marriage on from the sidelines.

Also know you aren’t alone.  When we were in the midst of our struggles, I liked to imagine God was sitting right beside me.  I’d have conversations with Him like we were friends chatting over coffee.  God can see into the deepest depths of your heart.  He knows exactly what it will take to restore hope into your heart, into your life and into your marriage.  He meets us where we are and loves us just as we are, sinners.  He showers us with his amazing grace.  We have a God who knows how we feel, and really cares.  He knows our doubts and hopelessness.  He can help when we’re willing to bring those things to him.  God walks with us during our hopeless times and never leaves us.

Lastly, make the choice to invite God in your marriage.  Romans 8:28 says And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.  Our marriages aren’t exempt from this.  When we are in the middle of a trial in marriage, it’s hard to see how God could ever use it for good.  But He has promised to use them for good, and He is faithful to keep His word.  Invite God into your marriage and allow Him to heal the hopeless and the hardness.  He will bring beauty from the ashes.

Sometimes we sit and reminisce about those gut-wrenching hard times.  We talk about how we couldn’t have made it without God.  And we talk about where we are now.

There is something so precious about struggling together and coming out on the other side hand-in-hand.

Filed in: marriage • by Amy • 31 Comments

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About Amy

Wife & Mama • Iced coffee seeker & curator of chaos • Collector of words & magic • Obsessed with laughter & bright lipstick • Dreaming & homesteading in the hills of PA

Comments

  1. Eboni

    September 14, 2020 at 8:39 pm

    What an encouraging story. My husband and I suffered from incidents of infidelity that left me broken and shattered. But through all the heartache and the pain God held us together and brought us through. Inviting God in is definitely the first step to restoring any marriage.

    Reply
    • Amy

      September 14, 2020 at 9:48 pm

      Praise Jesus for your marriage restoration! It’s not easy, but it sure is beautiful to walk out on the other side of a hard valley! Our marriage would have never survived if we hadn’t invited God in. We both knew we couldn’t do it on our own.

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