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Forever Beloved

Faith, Love & Truth

February 15, 2016

Before Saying I Do

It’s no secret, we rushed to get married. Um, hello…met in February, engaged in March and married in June. If that’s not rushing, I don’t know what is. But we didn’t get married for the reason most thought. We simply were ready for our happily ever after to begin. Oh, how naively we went into marriage.

Marriage is amazing and I love it, but it’s nothing like I thought it would be. Lately, I’ve been thinking of what I wish I had known before I got married. Things that would have made it easier to avoid some of our mistakes and to not fall into the traps couples so often do {us included}. Marriage introduces challenges that couples just simply aren’t prepared for.

Marriage is not about living happily ever after – If we were honest, we all crave a fairy-tale and a happy ending. I know I sure did. The problem isn’t wanting a fairy-tale romance but trying to compare your marriage and your spouse to those whirlwind romances in the movies. Open your heart up to Gods love first and He will show you how to truly love your husband without unreal expectations.

Marriage is not all about you – That’s a hard lesson to learn, isn’t it? Contrary to what the world tells you, it’s not about your happiness. It’s not about getting your needs met. It’s about going through life together and serving God and each other. It’s about committing yourselves to each other, even though you may be different people in the years to come.

The more you put into your marriage, the more you’ll get out of it – Marriage takes a lot of work and time, there is no doubt about that. Realize that straight away and commit to it. Go into marriage knowing your not going to have a 50/50 marriage, but a 100/100 marriage. Give your all because you love them, not because you expect something in return.

You can’t do it on your own – Marriage is difficult. That is obvious when you see how many couples end in divorce. It’s two imperfect people living together, failing daily. The only way to make your marriage truly work is to center it on Christ. God intended marriage to mirror His relationship with the church so that we could basically be a testimony to others and SHOW them what God is like. You have to rely on God for wisdom, power, love and strength for your marriage.

Make time for each other a priority – Make any time together into a mini-date. Whether it is running to the grocery store or a quick little ride on the 4-wheeler together. Snuggle in, hold hands and make that time together count.

Filed in: marriage, Uncategorized • by Amy • 1 Comment

February 12, 2016

40 Budget Friendly Date Ideas

I love going on dates with my husband, whether they are little mini-dates we catch here and there or a full day together. I love that feeling of just reconnecting with him and being able to give him my full attention without interruption. I think it’s so important to take time out of our busy lives to solely focus on each other. It keeps our marriage alive.

Romance doesn’t have to be expensive to be great! Here is a list of free or nearly free ideas to make your dating a pure pleasure:

  1. Walk through the mall, holding hands of course.
  2. Grab your skates and head to the roller-skating rink. What, not everyone has skates like I do? Believe me, my littles remind me every year that my skates are as old as dirt. As long as you don’t mind being the oldest people there who aren’t chaperoning their children, it’s a great way to have fun and let loose with each other.
  3. Fill the bed of the truck up with pillows + blankets, head out in a field, hop in the back and count your lucky stars.
  4. Celebrate the first snow fall with a day of sledding together. At the end of the day, head inside for hot cocoa and a hot shower.
  5. Have a winter picnic. Put a blanket on the living room floor, turn the TV off, turn the music on and light candles.
  6. Jump in the car and just drive with no destination in mind. Turn the music up, sing together, hold hands and enjoy the ride. Make a love song “mix tape” to enjoy during your drive. This one is one of my favs!
  7. Wake your love up early. Have coffee, donuts and lead them outside to watch the sunrise together.
  8. Grab your camera and head out. Stop at scenic locations and start taking pictures of each other. Be goofy and creative. Dare each other to put those wacky pictures on Facebook! The loser has to give a massage!
  9. Karaoke is a guaranteed fun night, even if you can’t hold a note to save your life.
  10. Go for a walk together in the woods.
  11. Have a spa day by pampering each other with massages, candles and music.
  12. Grab a tent, sleeping bag and head into the woods for a night of camping. Leave all the distractions behind. Spend the evening cuddling together under the stars talking for hours. If you don’t have a tent, you can get one for as cheap as $25 at Walmart. Sleeping bags can be as cheap as $10. 
  13. Re-enact one of your favorite dates from your “dating days”.
  14. Go to a park, push one another in the swings and talk. 
  15. Dance lessons are fun and romantic. You’re moving, bodies are touching, and you might be working up a little bit of sultry sweat. 
  16. Have a photoshoot together.
  17. Buy a pizza and play board games together.
  18. Head to an indoor or outdoor ice-skating rink — it’s the perfect excuse to hold hands!
  19. Go shooting together, something we love to do. I mean, hello, seeing your guy handle a gun is pretty hot. Just remember, safety first! 
  20. Celebrate your married romance by spending the day in bed together watching TV.
  21. Spend a night sharing your favorite memories from the past.  Stay in, turn off the TV, shut down your computer and ignore your phones. Just stay in the moment with each other.
  22. Pray together, taking turns thanking God for each other.
  23. Look through old photo albums together.
  24. Go to the drive-in, pack snacks and a blanket and get cozy in the back seat.
  25. Plan your dream vacation with each other — it might be the incentive you need to start putting your loose change in the piggy bank.
  26. Have your children play waiter and waitress and serve a romantic dinner, then tell them the story of how you fell in love.
  27. Volunteer together. I think watching my husband serve and seeing his heart is pretty amazing and makes me fall in love with him all over again.
  28. Spend the day together in the great outdoors. Go for a hike together, enjoying a day of great conversation while getting exercise at the same time.
  29. Build a snowman together.
  30. On a hot summer day, wash the car together, with the intent of splashing each other with water.
  31. Go play mini-golf.
  32. Go bowling and have fun laughing together! If you’re like us, that laughing will come from you accidentally stepping on the slippy lane, falling and splitting your pants. Not my most graceful moment.
  33. Write a love letter to each other, exchanging them after a candle light dinner.
  34. Have a “remember when” night. Reminisce about your dating days, when you fell in love and recall some of your best memories.
  35. Make a playlist {aka…mix tape} of your favorite slow songs. Cook your favorite meal together. Light the candles. Have a romantic dinner together! Once dinner is over, leave the dishes until the next day! Spend the rest of the evening slow dancing together!
  36. Search out some local music! 
  37. Go House Shopping. Even if you aren’t in the market for a new house, just go browse anyway. There is just something fun about the home-browsing process.
  38. Go for a moonlight walk. There is something very romantic about walking around at night, especially under the moonlight. Tell your spouse all the things you love about them and walk slowly.
  39. Kiss, dance and play in the rain.
  40. Head to a flea market or antique store.  I could spend hours browsing through the aisles, dreaming of what I could fit a baby in {I’m a photographer y’all}.  And thankfully, my husband enjoys these too!

Filed in: marriage, Uncategorized • by Amy • Leave a Comment

February 10, 2016

My Love Letter

Dear amazing, loving man…

Twenty years ago today we met in our best friends living room.

Little did I know that first night I met you that you were the one I had been praying for since I was a little girl. So many nights I spent on my knees, praying. Over the years the prayer changed from asking for prince charming to asking for a man that would simply love me and treat me well. All those years God knew you were the man for me, my future husband, and was busy preparing your heart for mine.

I can still remember the first moment that I saw your face. You were looking at me, and I thought to myself what in the world is this guy staring at. Year after year we repeatedly kept resurfacing in each others lives. Until finally, I realized you seemed very familiar to my heart. You stole my heart and our life journey began.

At that point in my life I needed to feel worthy, loved and protected. You rescued me from all the past pain, struggles and hurt. You showed me I didn’t need to be weary, always questioning, afraid and on alert. In your arms I felt safe and protected. You showed me that God did answer that little girl’s prayer for a prince charming.

You knew you were getting a broken girl, yet you grabbed my hand, looked me in the eye and stepped forward with me. With you by my side, everything else seemed to melt away. You put up with so much in those early days; tears that came from nowhere, fear that wasn’t understood and anger that was unfounded. Yet by my side you stood.  You continually held my hand and wiped away the tears.

And your voice, oh that voice, I’m not sure you ever truly understood how much it meant to me. When you sang to me, I believed every single word. Your voice mended my broken heart. The melody sewed the broken pieces back together. Your voice lifted me up, making me feel as if I was the only beautiful girl in the entire world. You didn’t just sing to me with your voice, you sang to me with your heart.  In that single moment the world stood still.  I finally not only knew, but felt what love was.

Being married to you has allowed me to be myself.  You’ve supported all of my crazy, spur-of-the-moment decisions…from getting my nose pierced to starting a photography business.  You just want me to be the best I can be and to be happy. You like me the way I am even though I am outspoken, sometimes sassy and I roll my eyes more often than I should. You are so patient with me (which is no easy task, sir). You allow me to just be Amy.

It’s never been about how pretty I make myself, my size or how well I did. Although you notice those things, I know that none of that makes a difference on your measure of love for me, and that is the most beautiful thing of all.

It takes a real man to love me like you do. To love me on my good days when I’m all dolled up, kissing you and laughing AND also on the bad days when I’m a sobbing mess on the couch in my leggings and messy bun.

The reality of our marriage has been so much more complex. We’ve been through too many ups and downs to count.  At every crossroad we had a choice to make…keep committing to our love or give up. Every time, we choose love.

Over the years, you have gone above and beyond so many times.  I’ll never be able to fully tell you how much that meant to me.  Throughout my 15 surgeries, you took amazing care of me.  After my first big surgery, I remember a specific conversation we had.  I was standing in front of the mirror looking at my scars for the first time.  I stood there, looking in the mirror silently, for what felt like an eternity.  I was horrified at how my body had changed.  I’ll never forget your words “All I see is you, here with me right now, alive“.  And even now, on days I’m still self-conscious of the remnants from my stroke, you remind me that I’m beautiful just how I am.

Being married to you is the most interesting, challenging, amazing, mind-opening, loving, growth-inspiring decision I ever made. Such an amazing man I’ve been blessed with. I look forward to 50 more years of crazy love.

I love you so very much, Mr. Cutler.  You are my sweetest downfall.
xoxo


Filed in: marriage, Uncategorized • by Amy • 1 Comment

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Wife & Mama • Iced coffee seeker & curator of chaos • Collector of words & magic • Obsessed with laughter & bright lipstick • Dreaming & homesteading in the hills of PA

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