Forever Beloved

Faith, Love & Truth

To All Married Women

I think there are some sweet women that need this encouragement today. And there is lots of good advice here that all of us {myself at the top of the list} can benefit from.

1. Don’t give up. With God in your marriage, all things are possible. {1 Corinthians 13:7}

2. Respect your husband. It’s important and something he’ll be grateful for. {Ephesians 5:33}

3. Forgive. We are all sinners and none of us are perfect. {Ephesians 4:32}

4. Talk + talk + talk + talk. Communication is a necessity in marriage. {Proverbs 15:2}

5. Don’t speak badly of your husband in front of others. Ever. You would expect the same in return. {Ephesians 4:32}

6. Never go to bed angry. {Ephesians 4:31}

7. Don’t focus on his faults. Everyone has faults, including you.

8. Passion doesn’t have to fade. Simply don’t allow it to. {Proverbs 5:18-19}

9. Be nice. {Galations 5:22-23}

10. Keep God in your marriage and honor Him. This is SUPER important. {Colossians 3:17}

11. Pray for your marriage and your spouse. Pray hard and pray daily. Pray alone and pray with your spouse.

12. Guard your heart. You don’t realize how quickly and easily someone else can get to your heart. {Proverbs 4:23}

13. Say I’m sorry. Something that isn’t easy but it’s needed. {Colossians 3:13}

14. Even if you feel your marriage is broken, there is always hope. Give it to God! With God all things are possible! {Matthew 19:26}

15. Go to church together. I have to say, I adore sitting in a pew with my husband, holding hands and listening to the sermon together. {Hebrews 10:24-25}

16. Kiss him, dance with him on a whim and hold his hand in front of your kids. Show them your romance. What a perfect place for them to learn about love.

17. Laughter and fun are important. One of the things that drew me to my husband was how easily he could make me laugh. Twenty years later we are still laughing.

18. Have a gentle submissive spirit. Voluntary submission is something asked of us directly by God. {Ephesians 5:22}

19. Don’t be selfish. Life isn’t all about you. {Philippians 2:4}

20. Your marriage is a testimony! You never know how many people might be drawn closer to Christ because they were watching your marriage walk.

 

What The Ingalls Taught Me About Marriage

As a child, Little House on the Prairie was one of my favorite shows. I fell in love with Laura and her life, as I was a young girl myself. I’m fairly sure this girl right here was born in the wrong generation. Their simple living just fascinated me, it still does!

I admit, anytime there is a rerun on I just can’t pass it up. Watching them as an adult with children of my own gave me such a new perspective.  One I never had before.  I’ve realized just how many great life lessons there are in their shows, lessons today’s shows just don’t hold a candle to.

Forgiveness

Caroline Ingalls: When you love somebody, it’s worth putting your pride behind you.

If anyone was good at forgiving, it was Caroline and Charles. If they had a tiff, you could count on it being resolved quickly. They would quickly put their pride aside, forgive each other and move on.  They did spend time deciding who was at fault, or pointing fingers.  They just sweetly offered forgiveness.God wants our love to be sweet, soft-hearted and lovely. And He wants it overflowing with forgiveness. By offering forgiveness, we are offering the grace that God has given us. Don’t cling to prior offenses, tucking them in your pocket to use later. Simply wipe the slate clean as soon as the offense happens. This will not only set your husband free, but you as well. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. {Colossians 3:13}

Humility

Charles: I still have my lady, and I want you to know that you mean more to me than anything in this world.
Caroline: Oh, Charles!

They both practiced humility. When Charles would make a remark about her beauty, she humbly replied, “Oh, Charles,” and tossed her head to the side in such a beautiful fashion. Later in the same episode the family remarks about how much she deserves a new dress because she never gets anything new. So humbled by their kindness, she breaks out in tears.

I’m slowly realizing that humility is one of the most important ingredients in marriage. To have humility and submission, our desire to come first must be put aside. We have to put it aside for the good of another. With humility, you’ll be sensitive towards others without complaining. When we come together honestly and humbly, it gives us space to forgive each other when necessary. And you’ll feel such thankfulness and gratitude at the jobs God assigns you.

She openly loved him

Charles Ingalls: Look at you.Caroline Ingalls: I must be a sight.Charles Ingalls: You are. Your face is dirty, your hair’s all askew, and your still the prettiest woman a man ever set his eyes on. The only thing I regret about being married to you is that I’ll never have the joy of asking you to be my wife again.

Caroline was always openly in love with her husband and honored him in front of their children. They would kiss and flirt and just be mushy together in front of the girls all the time. Caroline puts her hand print on each corn cake she makes, because Charles said that just having her hand print on it means he doesn’t need to add any other sweetener. Awwww! She’s seen playing with his hair when he’s resting in the grass. She laughs when he’s being silly, and she lifts him up in status when she talks about him to the girls. He’s the hero of the family, and she speaks of him to the girls that way. She gets the girls excited to see him come home, and pumps them up for the fun they’ll have when he gets back from hunting. She just loves seeing her family enjoy each other.

It’s really important that our kids can watch us giving our spouse love and respect. That they can see we are still pursuing our spouses heart. The byproduct is that kids witness their parents dating. When children see their parents giving each other time, affection, and respect it is a reassurance of our love and makes them feel secure.

Our kids are watching us. They are learning to be comfortable with affection and to be affectionate with their own partner in the long run. Kiss your husband, dance with him and hold his hand. pursue his heart. Show them your romance. What an absolutely perfect place for them to learn about love!

She allowed Charles to lead

Caroline Ingalls: My home is where you are. And you are the children are my family.
Charles Ingalls: Caroline Ingalls, I love you.

Caroline was the BEST at letting her husband lead without interfering. He was the head of the household and she respected him and his position. There were many episodes where Charles would make a decision that she didn’t quite agree with but, out of respect, she went along.
Each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. {Ephesians 5:33} I’ve read this verse over and over again. it doesn’t say respect your husband only when you feel he deserves it, it doesn’t say he has to GIVE respect to GET respect and it’s certainly not up to us to deem when he is worthy of it. God was pretty clear with this verse, the wife MUST respect her husband.

 

Embarrass Your Littles

Children love seeing their parents get affectionate, whether they admit it or not. I’m sure they may not act like it and you might hear shouts of gross or yuck.  But deep down they don’t hate it nearly as much as they let on. Normally, the shouts are said with a smile on their face.

I think it’s great for kids to see their Mom and Dad putting their relationship first. Most of the time, especially in today’s society, the opposite happens. Parents are making their kids a priority and at the end of the day, they just don’t have any time left for each other.  The kids grow up and leave home and the parents are left looking at each other like strangers.

It’s so important that our kids can watch us giving our spouse love and respect. That they can see we are still pursuing our spouses heart. The byproduct is that our children can watch their parents dating. When children see their parents giving each other time, affection, and respect it is a reassurance of our love and makes them feel secure.

Our kids are watching us. They are learning to be comfortable with affection and to be affectionate with their own partner in the long run. They are learning from us what marriage looks like.

Don’t ever be afraid to kiss your husband in front of your littles, dance with him in the kitchen and hold his hand. Pursue his heart. Show them your romance. What an absolutely perfect place for them to learn about love!

Here is one of my fav stories…

A few years ago the kids and I went to visit my Grandma in the nursing home. We were there during lunch and sat in the dining room with her. There were many tables in the room with people scattered around them. One table in particular caught my attention. The entire table was empty except for an elderly man and woman, sitting right beside each other arm to arm. I thought it was totally cute and figured they were married. Grandma told me they weren’t married, they were just “dating”.  My heart did a little sigh, oh how cute that was!  

On the drive home, the kids and I were talking about that couple and how cute it is that they are “dating” when they are probably in their 80’s or older. And Jade made a statement that not only made me laugh but also made me stop and think that maybe, just maybe, her Dad and I ARE showing them what marriage should look like.

Jade said…When I’m old, I hope my husband still slaps my butt when I walk past him.

Now I’m not saying by any means that Joe and I are inappropriate BUT we are a very affectionate family. I love you is a daily statement in our household between all of us. Hugs and kisses are never, ever spared. And yes, there might be an occasional butt slap when I walk past him.

We are not only telling our kids what a happy, healthy marriage looks like, we are showing them! Go ahead, embarrass your littles. Show them your healthy marriage. Pursue your husbands heart and plant a big ole’ smooch on him today.